A series of timely and accurate impressions.

It’s CollegeHumor’s annual gift exchange, and somebody’s always gotta be “the wise guy!”

Don’t you hate it?

This video is hardly working.

Office relationships can be complicated. Some more so than others.

Some people think there’s more to life than work. They’re called “middle management”.

It’s criminal how much fun we have when we go out.

Don’t think of him as your teacher. Think of him as your best friend. Please?

She’s back. Not that you even care. You haven’t even said how pretty she looks. Tell her she’s funny.

Sometimes when you’re bored, your mind starts to wander.

Some people think office romances aren’t a good idea. Those people probably just can’t close a deal.

You’ll never guess what happens in this video.

Some movies you just never want to see again. Period. Ever.

You like Hardly Working videos? Their early work was a little too New Wave for my taste.

Some promises weren’t made to be broken into tiny little pieces.

Saving the world from the burritos of injustice.

Meat is murder.

Dan teaches CH’s new editor about the Final Cut Pros and cons of making office videos.

The rhythm is going to kill you.

Sometimes you have to think outside of the closet.

It’s all fun and games until you have to call Pat’s dad.

They’re gonna need a bigger battlestar.

The lack of human decency in this world is shocking.

When it comes to sweets, things can get bitter fast.

Facebook changes everything.

The decade that defined a generation. Some differently than others.

His nails may be black, but his heart is tie-dye.

Meet the new director of technology or whatever.

It’s important to respect a person’s privacy. Unless you want to know their secrets.

She was fishing for them. Honestly.

Leaked footage of CollegeHumor’s biggest diva having an epic meltdown on set.

It’s the thought that counts.

Everyone has a secret. Some hide them better than others.

Please silence your cell phone before watching this video.

This video was shot in front of a live studio audience.

Wait, wait, don’t tell us.

This may be the weirdest depression ever. Period.

The most important thing about a prank is the bait. Also the switch.

Terror at 4 1/2 feet.

You can only imagine what happens when we lollygag.

A rousing game of whocummit.

Sometimes you just need to drop what you’re doing and unwind.

CollegeHumor’s Director of Technology is back from the future.

Yo momma is so loved, you take “Mama’s Boy” as a compliment.

They grow up so fast.

That was my boy!

3 Dimensional 3 Furious.

Sometimes you have to look out for Number 2.

Sometimes it feels like people are looking right through you.

He’s bluffing.

He wants more than your milk money.

The dudes in the office have gone way too far.

If you’re going to be offensive, check your surroundings.

He’s back, and he’s going to inspire you. To leave.

We ride together, we digest food in our external pyloric stomach together. Starfish for life!

It’s your worst nightmare: No more texting.

Relax. It was just a thing that went bump in the night.

It’s not prejudice when it’s such a disgusting affliction.

Broken arms don’t hurt as much as broken dreams.

Sometimes two people just click, ya know?

Let the rhythm take you over. Bailamos.

Don’t call her a hero. She has no idea what that word means.

If you’re going to wax poetic, make sure you have enough wax.

Learon visits the office to get a taste of American culture, sprinkled with a little pepper sauce.

Let he who is without lunch cast the first stone.

Dan should’ve worn his contacts.

She’s so courteous it’s scary.

It seems today that all you see is violence in the workplace.

Vampires are basically a sport.

Move over, old office.

It’s just a scratch. A horrible, infectious scratch.

Task lists and Excel and faxes. Oh my.

Just go with the flow (of the placenta from the uterus).

Aww dude, I have the munchies pretty hard for a crisp Caesar salad right now.

It’s like going to 4th base.

Anticipation is Danger’s middle name.

The two most fashionable dudes in the office pay the ultimate price.

The only thing thicker than their accents are their heads.

First in line at the Apple store by 250 years.

Dan is beside himself. His weird, purple-and-yellow self.

There’s no such thing as bad news on a basketball phone.

There’s a party in his pants and you’re not invited, you’re required.

Reel friends! Real fun!

J-Witz ain’t too smart, yo.

Too much of a good thing leads to broken things.

It’s called a mustache because it must ache to have one.

Looks can be deceiving.

Fanship is stronger than friendom.

Decision making can be dangerous.

A sketch about nothing.

Danger is not his middle name.

Being sucked into the bowels of Hell has never been so comfortable.

To some, Boy Meets World is more than just a show.

What if you could see the future, and it looked like an idiot?

Being broke stinks.

He should really stop hitting himself.

Some jokes go too far. This isn’t one of them.

Watch your back. And your head.

The one thing he hates more than missing his nap is the sun.

It’s not what you say, it’s where you stand when you say it.

All hands on deck!

The epic battle for Middle Desk.

The next step in the blame game.

Let him eat cakes.

Streeter’s new character blows up.

The drug that plays with your head before you even take it.

If you can’t save ‘em, join ‘em.

It’s just a harmless novelty keychain, right?

If you love somebody, don’t set them free.

Love comes in all shapes and sizes.

Dan and David do a simple workout together.

An experiment gone horribly average.

Jake loves two things: partying hard and airtight arguments.

Creativity is 1% inspiration and 99% irritation.

Brace yourself.

You can’t always eat what you want.

Sometimes, you have to improvise. Even when you shouldn’t.

I think we’re saying the same thing here.

You say tomato. I say shut up.

He’s God’s GIF to mankind.

Suck it up.

The best web strategy is one you don’t understand.

It was buried deep inside them.

There’s a first time for everything.

Too cute for words. Nice words, anyway.

He’s dead serious.

Dream a little bigger. Or at all, really.

Dig in. Pig out.

The most dangerous mind is an idiot’s.

The truth is ugly sometimes, especially if it’s made of polyester.

Some gangsters give David a hard time.

Walk a mile in your own shoes.

Jeff covers up a little too much.

You didn’t study, did you?

For Pat’s parents, it’s 5pm everywhere.

Dan tries to go glass to glass.

Say neigh to horseplay.

They’re not just happy to see you.

There are no bad ideas.

Love is blind, fortunately.

The early bird gets the drunk.

The many, many famous people I’ve met are no big deal.

Josh enters the dark world of pretend meth dealing.

David and Pat are too frustrated for words.

Murph falls for the grossest joke in the book.

Working together, we can become less powerful than you could possibly imagine.

Pat meets the star of “Rushmore,” “Ghostbusters,” and his worst nightmare.

We’re not “mad”.

Pat, David, and Emily shoot nothing but net.

The safest thing you can do is not listen to him.

The gang recalls a night to vaguely remember.

Pat and Emily create the perfect warrior – whether they want to or not.

Pat learns the best defense is way-too-much offense.

Murph does his business by the book.

The annoyance rises, Brother!

The gang is exposed to some new fashion.

They will scare you to your core.

Don’t give in to Shakespeer-pressure.

Growing up is contagious and often fatal.

One zinger to rule them all.

Dan gives Pat and Owen some terrible, adorable news.

No email. No Internet. No hope.

They’re weapons of self-destruction.

Owen’s college rivals are total classholes.

Pat & Street’s new prank show has a great catchphrase. And little else.

There are no small parts.

Watch this video standing and you’ll burn 2 extra calories.

Fasting makes them furious.

Imagine doing all that just to watch a movie.

She’s a 10 but her phone’s a 1.0.

What’s a “Leonardo DiCaprio?”

He’s just in it for the free juiceboxes.

Watch now before it’s not worth your time.

Judging someone is not alright, alright, alright.

It’s now socially unacceptable to do anything, anywhere.

No Caption

He lived in Chicago for a summer ten years ago, so you know he reps the Bears.

We all know one. Just maybe not this bad.

You can pry it from his soft, foam hands.

Are you willing to fartyr yourself?

They’re shredded in the head.

Scoot and Zipper advise your website on how to get mad hits.

It’s more addictive than Game of Thrones.

Bro, your homophobia is showing.

Your deepest fantasies meet your favorite fantasy game.

We all know an anti-sports robot.

Give the gift of lying.

Reach for your dreams, and see what pops up.

He totally goes with the flow. Or not. He’ll let you know if he can.

I just gotta pee quick, and then I’ll be ready.

Who is our protagonist? What is his motivation?

He doesn’t have a job, so he hangs out at yours.

It’s fine to just leave.

If at first you don’t succeed, just redefine success.

Your weird is my normal. Unless that’s weird.

The perfect braid for getting decapitated.

Relax your mind so you can destroy your body.

It was crazy, but also, it was insane.

Ain’t no party like a third party because the third party makes terrible controllers.

That’s so sad. Want a sandwich?

It’s called hyperactive listening.

The ‘80s were a wacky, rape-y time.

This is actually affecting me. Weird!

I before “e” especially after grief.

Just start a new fucking thread already.

Because you never know when the end might come.

You’ll never be safe (or happy) again.

No one is safe from the sync.

Secrets, secrets are no fun, unless they are for – wait, don’t tell anyone!

What do you mean it’s frowned upon?

Just don’t look at them.

But can’t you two just talk in person?

Dude, please stop talking.

You clearly don’t under – pants.

Don’t limit yourselves, there are so many more options!

Everyone likes fall and pumpkin spice lattes don’t even fucking taste like pumpkin.

She used to be quirky, now she’s kooky.

Coming out can be crazy, but clearly not as crazy as shirts.

Oh perfect, a monthly subscription of complete bullshit.

Can you hurry up so I can talk about me?

Witness one man’s completely unnecessary journey.

Wasn’t that, like, over a decade ago?

It’s a vicious cycle.

Looks like it’s time for yet another unwarranted acceptance speech on Facebook.

Please, don’t get our hopes up again.

Everyone who works here is pretty special in their own way.

Think of all the things you can do with that money instead.

She’s the worst. And she’s everywhere.

Holy shit, am I right?

Stop complaining, you grouchy shit.

But seriously, why would you think I’d click that link?

Female birth control is getting a little out of hand.

Clearly, the only way to fame is murder.

It needs to be biting and deadly.

If only that’s how diets worked in real life.

Girl, we are getting a bottle of wine.

Just take the fucking compliment.

I’m faking you all out.

So close, and yet so far.

Niiiice.

Did you remember to subtract then re-add the super delegates?

Alright, alright, alright…

It’s an elementary act of deduction.

Every young Lothario needs a trusty albatross to balance out the wing man.

Silly breakfast mascot, everyone knows oatmeal is for sad adults!

You see, this is our Facebook thread now.

Just say no.

It’s not selfish if you neeeeed it.

The beloved, classic tale of a failing foreign culture saved by a white man.

At least Grant thinks they’re funny.

Some people see nothing special in sharing funny Internet videos, but they’re wrong.

Are you the kind of bad bitch who wears $500 t-shirts just because?

Four sneezes deep and you’re just a terrorist to goodwill and productivity.

Do you know anyone at the North or South pole who might want our fleece-lined boxers?

For a totally believable story you’re gonna need a truly embarrassing photo.

We would have crushed it in the 1770s.

Sometimes all you wanna do is slap a butt on a thumbnail and go the eff home.

Who talks first? And what if he’s wearing terrible cologne? And what if we get murdered?

If you want people to see your little “YouTubes,” you best throw us some dough, capisce?

Putting the “W” in “NSFW”.

Nothing we love more than hangin’ with our buds when we’re horny!

A-holes’ opinions are meaningless, unless there’s 500 of them.

Everybody knows earthquakes are more afraid of you than you are of them.

If you’re not sure you have one, you might be one.

You’ve got high standards, and we’ve got the high quality goods to match.

Isn’t that technically a microaggression?

It’s crazy to think that buffoon could ever win an election.

When spring turns to summer/And there are blossoms on the trees/The August air doth turn to ice/And all the women freeze!

What are we supposed to do, make normal small talk?

A nail biting contest of irresponsibility.

No one “just” tags people randomly on Facebook.

You know you’re on the right track when you look like Jeff Goldblum in The Fly.

The evil men do will not be forgiven by any just God.

There’s ALWAYS a reason.

It’s fun to have an office doppelganger!

Water is healthy, less so when you add crushed up Xanax.

Where the hell were you?

Our patronus is a mountain hare, which gives us the courage to say that your horoscope is ridiculous.

Gobble gobble, motherf***er.

You will never know the pain of being truly alone on National Calico Cat Appreciation Day.

If you can’t tweet ‘em, join ‘em. Or something like that.

On the other hand, how else are you going to get your mitts on gallon tubs of hummus?

At least Donald Duck was in the navy.

Obviously, the only way to prove to your friend that your relationship transcends decades of discrimination is to brutally mock them.

One doesn’t simply ‘leave the bar’ when the trivia begins.

Now the backlash to a backlash to sports has lashed back to a backlash to a backlash to a backlash to sports.

Oh, boy, Mondays, am I right?

Finally, a meditation app to help you destress from push notifications on your productivity app.

We say: lean into it.

If you’ve never used Waze to hit on a hot mama in traffic, GTFO.

It takes a big man to drink from a chalice.

The past nine days have really changed everything.

Bending the laws of time and space; violating the laws of personal space.

You guys are such flirty little a-holes.

Be on the lookout for \Uh-Oh! Furniture Tunnel!

Netflix and extremely not chill.

Why did they have to make them all the tasty colors?

It’s called letterboxing.

I guess my eyes have just evolved to be like, so progressive.

No one cares about elves, Trapp.

Bad news, sir. The aliens are INTJ, and we’re ENTP. Totally incompatible.

If Grant is taller than Katie, but shorter than Zac, but Katie is taller than Zac… What the fuck is happening?!

But seriously, how tall is he?

We love having Raph around the office. On another note, why is the new janitor pitching sketches?

Oh god, next he’ll tell us how bad traffic was….

The guy who has trouble reading has us in the palm of his hand!

Oh, I lived in Chicago, but only in a small locked room.

This is dark, ancient magic.

Uhhh’ one second, I’ve got a GoFundMe page that I need to delete.

At least I have all my clothes on this time.

DMT’s still legal though, right?

The saliva activates the crystals.

Quiet down, guys! There’s a new girl, so we gotta be nice.

Oh, Grant.

Fly to Maui for two days? Sure!

Hi, it’s me, the person who completely misses the point, here to tell you, men get murdered, too.

Ahh! My glass menagerie!

I shouldn’t need to refill my gas tank on the way to your house.

“Just be yourself” only works if you’re like, super cool to begin with.

When you don’t hear what someone said to you, sometimes the best plan is to just throw yourself into a ravine.

You wouldn’t want to be rude, would you? We didn’t think so.

Not caring about anything is surprisingly annoying.

So Ally’s the hot new cheese on the pizza, is she? Oh, you boys!

The standoff to show once and for all who is the bigger garbage person: Rekha or Ally.

He’s like Stretch Armstrong left in a car console on a hot summer day.

You don’t know how to swim? But it’s so easy! Just jump in the water and swim! See? So easy.

Lenjamin hypes stuff up just a little too much. A BLT didn’t “change your life,” man.

Why can’t we just drink and hang out? Jeez, what are you, a close friend of mine?

Make up your mind, health nuts! Next, you’ll say cigarettes are bad for me!

Raph’s not a fan of our Jake and Amir dolls, even though they’re made with Jake and Amir’s real hair and skin.

If we didn’t want to invite you, why would we have included garlic-free tapas and a ‘blood’ option on the menu?

Katie’s office joke costume budget is over $530,000 a year.

This colossal big time piece of crap loser is the best friend I’ve ever had.

Sorry, Andrew W.K., but there IS such thing as partying too hard.

I’m still sour about her sketch “Whoever Writes Our YouTube Video Descriptions Smells Like Cat Dander And Fart”.

Go ahead and remove that Blue Snowball microphone from your Amazon cart. It’s not gonna work.

It has absolutely not been too long.

We had to demolish the whole office building. Thanks, Zac.

That festive-depressive time of year for bummer carols, morbid melodies, and mugs of milky liquor.

Coming up next, more of those Greek Cathtestants of the Latter Day Saints classics.

I got you this tattoo of a sick-ass dragon on my back for Hanukkah. You’re welcome.

Oh, Grant, relax and shut up – it all makes sense if you don’t think about it.

If everything goes according to plan, we’ll have a little bash on my deathbed.

Mayday, mayday – I’m trapped in a vortex, and none of my social cues are working.

It’s actually a really normal fetish. There’s, like, a whole subreddit for it.

Hopefully somebody up in heaven will help Raph figure out what to have for lunch today.

No one cares what the traffic was like.

I’m whatever generation it is when you can never die because of a sacrifice made to the olden gods.

I was going to respond, as soon as I finished inhaling.

Leave the grudges to those two terrifying Asian ghost children.

This sketch is funnier than famous 1920s french clown, Pierre LePie!

We finally answer the YouTube commenters’ burning question.

Can’t we all put our phones away and try to be present during this emergency?

So you’re telling me that my mom’s Sweetest Boy in World poll was wrong?

I’m supposed to write a caption but honestly I wasn’t really paying attention.

But he seems like such a nice guy.

Oh, the good (sort of) old days.

Take off your shoes in a stranger’s car just a few times, and all of a sudden you’re “disgusting”.

People are so stubborn about “rights”.

Katie is the Rain Man of making up sketch pitches on the spot.

These half-assed online pranks are so lame. Unless they’re about genie movies. Those are still good.

Grant’s working smarter, not harder.

He might be missing teeth, but his gut flora’s never looked better.

They’re throwing out the rulebook for a different copy of that same rulebook.

Phones are for storing important contacts like “Red Shirt – Starbucks”.

If only nerds knew what it felt like to be mocked for their interests.

The way these babies fight for their lives is so inspiring, it would be wrong to intervene.

Young Thug is so uncouth. Raph prefers classic songs like Other People’s P*ssy.

Why won’t you do this one thing for me that I secretly want to do?

Who wants to go to the South, anyway?

Brennan is not going to let the tiniest bit of Ebola stop him from pitching 3-4 comedy sketches.

What do Grant, Raph, Katie, and handsome ex-heart surgeon Bassem Youssef all have in common?

Raph’s creepy stalker was taking pictures of him nine months before he was even born.

Brennan is there for Rekha, and that means he needs to abandon all logic.

How dare you forsake pumpkin spice?

Grant has amnesia. Not even a cool story. He hit his head on his car roof because he forgot it’s not a convertible.

My friends give the best advice. Did I say best? I meant most.

Don’t worry, Brennan has the perfect dinner party guest list to kill Hitler and stop 9/11.

The survival rate for public humiliation has gotten way too high.

The language of love can be hard to crack.

Everybody worries about the victim, but what about the person that caused them pain? Are they supposed to reflect on it and change? That seems hard!

Brennan is from beautiful New York City. YEAH, HE SAID IT. BEAUTIFUL. SORRY YOU’RE SCARED OF PIGEONS AND CLUTCH YOUR BAG CLOSE EVERY TIME SOMEONE SPEAKS ABOVE A WHISPER.

If you think about it, aren’t turd holders the true persecuted minority?

She really means it this time.

Is it too much to ask for Trapp, Raph, and Jess to keep a simple 12th of the year open to celebrate Rekha’s entrance into the world?

Hey, everybody has different tastes, but if you don’t like movies as a whole you’re a confusing robot to me and I don’t trust you.

Katie, Jess, and Grant’s moms are all extremely good and have never done anything bad nor have any negative qualities, in my opinion. My mom, on the other hand, is a PSYCHO!

KABLAMMO! RIGHT IN THE NARDS!

Raph must be some sort of escaped psychopath and/or serial murderer if he actually ENJOYS the holiday where you dress up and have fun parties and eat candy.

Grant and Katie will be lucky to get out of this one alive, thanks to his poor choice of scary mask and no thanks to Katie being weirdly helpful.

Jess is more than ready to celebrate the birth of our lord Jesus Christ but Siobhan, Katie, and Raph think it’s a little premature. We haven’t even eaten from a turkey’s carcass for Thanksgiving!

Katie’s meme went viral. And now that she’s in high demand from all the hollywood big wigs, she doesn’t have to talk to, acknowledge, even SHARE A ROOM with these LOSERS.

Make sure to thank black women for all that they do. Then, go get a cupcake! You’ve earned it!

Trapp, Katie, and Ally are ready to go see LEBRON JAMES, but Raph is too busy eating that normal meal that we all love, a large steak and three hardboiled eggs.

Raph misses the good old days, when Cyber Monday just meant spending your savings on a TV that’s 5 inches bigger than your current one.

The only thing worse than someone being 30 minutes late is any confrontation with anyone ever.

Now that Katie’s getting married, she just wants you to know that under NO circumstances is there to be even a HINT of a flirt thrown in her direction, you filthy DOGS

Supercalifragilisticexpialicollegedebt.

Gartholemew’s got that irresistible shmear of mystique.

Constant suffering is so much easier than remembering to find new pants.

Rekha and Grant are living in a fantasy world of new food choices, meanwhile Brennan hasn’t looked at a menu in 24 years.

Mmm… a pot of melted junior mints.

If I catch ANYONE even LIGHTLY teasing Brennan, I will flip out, because he has literally no resilience and folds like origami and I don’t think he can eat solid food?

This sketch was written by a robot, with the help of Botnik. By the way, writers, if you’re reading this, thank you so much, we’re not going to need you anymore. Best of luck! Call if you need a reference!

To watch a sketch is to insert yourself into the sketch. Comedy is a shell which we can choose to inhabit and vicariously experience the humor of laughing throughout.

Raph’s always upset that he’s not being told things everyone else around the office knows, like that he died 6 months ago in a laptop fire.

Real love is all about the romantic gestures he uses to manipulate and control you.

Raph gets frustrated when Submarine’s friend just can’t seem to get his name right!

I’d rattle some chains at you, but my usual chains broke, and my ghost blacksmith got sent to purgatory, so I need to find a new one, and I haven’t gotten around to it, y’know…

Unfortunately, IT refuses to do any work on any electronics Grant owns after the slime incident.

Trapp is saddled with a mystery of microbial proportions.

Which is more annoying: robocalls, or being kidnapped? Sound off in the comments!

Raph wishes his horny coworkers would finally make sense on this day, the holiest of the year.

Wow, did your parents even let you outside? I’ve seen parents like yours in movies.

Once you start hoarding emails, where does it stop?

It’s not beauty, it’s wellness.

Brennan’s sick, and the only cure is the approval of strangers.

Sure she’s competent, but could I grab a BEER with her?

When the TV remote goes missing, Raph can’t trust Grant - or his ass.

What do you expect? This guy went to acting school.

Raph did Ally a favor, and that deserves to be heard by everyone.

You went to the store and picked this out!

Even more backstory about Katie’s iconic baseball career!

Who wouldn’t want to smoke some “Purple Rat Poison Haze” or “OG You Will Die Alone Kush?”

New cast members Lily and Tao reveal their true selves in the quickest and chillest way possible.

You being younger than me means that I should have done everything differently.

Anyone can like the sun, it takes profound genius to love the wet stuff that causes car accidents.

All good people are hot, and all mean people are ugly.

All women are beautiful (with makeup).

If you can’t jam random knowledge from your major into current conversations, what was college for?

Ignore those new age products promising to fix your nasty snatch & stick to what’s safe – nothing!

As an adult, you can’t have a real summer vacation, you’re just leaving work during the hot months.

If you have bad opinions, don’t agree with my good ones!

Exclusionary group chats only lead to violence.

It’s too hot to get cold, duh!

The truth is, wanting to feel a little better is a huge judgment on the rest of us.

That stale grocery store cake really shows everyone how much you care.

Mutual love and respect? Sounds like somebody’s *chk-shhh* whipped!

If everyone likes something, that means it is both dumb and bad.

What a sick weirdo enjoying the most popular true crime media.

It only takes 5 minutes to walk there, so… yum?

You signed up to organize this medium-sized wedding when you were elected.

Psst, I heard Grant is getting an F.

Why don’t we just improvise gibberish like we always do?

Humans heal by dumping on each other, so just tell me one weird or shameful thing about your life!

Go bigger or go home.

You think you’re so interesting that watching you play video games is entertainment.

Do you want her to look desperate?

If you’re correcting someone, you at least have to be correct.

This is what HR is for!

It sounds like you’re in a healthy, functional relationship.

Does the knife really have to be a metaphor?

Maybe I’m just suddenly allergic to everything?

Raise your hands if you only like movies starring puppets

She’s salty and unpredictable, but she can cause the perfect storm. Not to mention the crabs.

She’s technically 30, but she has the practical life skills of a toddler.

Attempting cardio isn’t going to outweigh the drugs you’ve done.

You can’t get through life if you haven’t seen the 2001 classic “The Luck of the Irish”.

You’re not better than anyone just because you bought tickets to see the opener.

Perfume is just gassy soap! I don’t *need* to enjoy things without explicit practical value!

Don’t be a dummy!

Sharing findom duties is a lot of responsibility.

The best things in life are free, which is why Tao’s friendship is not.

Sure, it’s undermined the fabric of our democracy AND destroyed us, but otherwise it’s a good way to kill some time.

Katie’s there for you, if you confide in her immediately.

Bacon, pizza, tacos…POTATOES.

Not to be insulting, but HOW DID YOU GET ON THE MOST EXCLUSIVE DATING APP?!

We are discontent with the amount of content out there.

You’re just SO good at doing manual labor that I would otherwise have to do, ya know?

My newest fan, r710hgmz2811, just LOVES posting about Bitcoin!

NOT YOU TOO, BOB BALABAN!

Visible scars are always cool, except when they’re not.

Put me down as a “Maybe”.